If you’ve ever hit a wall – whether it’s burnout, big life changes, loss, or just waking up one day feeling completely disconnected from your own life, you’ll know that moment where you stop and think: ‘Something’s got to change’.
For a lot of people I work with, that’s the moment when they start searching for something deeper. More balance. More meaning. More ‘them’ in their day-to-day life.
And that search is what we call alignment. This isn’t about finding the perfect morning routine or becoming a new person. It’s about getting back to who you already are underneath all the noise, stress, and ‘shoulds’.
So, what is alignment?
Let’s get one thing straight: alignment is not a trend or a vibe. It’s about feeling like your life actually fits. Like the things you say ‘yes’ to, the people you spend time with, and the way you run your day all reflect you, not just the roles you play.
You know that feeling when you’re constantly saying ‘yes’ to stuff you don’t want to do, bending over backwards to please everyone, and running on empty? That’s misalignment. On the flip side, when you’re living in alignment:
- You feel calmer
- You trust yourself more
- You stop second-guessing everything
- You actually enjoy the life you’ve created
Sounds simple. But most of us don’t land there by accident. We get there because we’ve been out of alignment for so long that something finally clicks.
Burn-out, loss, or ‘enough is enough’
Let’s talk about that moment where alignment suddenly becomes non-negotiable. For a lot of my clients it comes after something hard. Burn-out, grief, a wake-up call, or just a slow building of stress that eventually tips over. You’ve spent years pushing, doing, being ‘on’. And at some point, it all just… stops working. That’s when the questions start showing up:
- What do I actually want?
- What am I doing all this for?
- Who am I even doing it for?
The truth is, the answers probably won’t come from another to-do list. They come from slowing down and getting honest about what isn’t working any more.
Alignment isn’t just big decisions – it’s the everyday stuff
One of the biggest myths about creating an aligned life is that you have to throw everything away and start from scratch. That’s not true at all. Most of the time, alignment is about small, consistent choices. It’s about:
- Saying ‘no’ when you mean it
- Creating space in your week to rest, move, or do something fun
- Working with clients that light you up (not drain you)
- Letting go of the pressure to be everything to everyone
- Having boundaries that actually protect your peace
It’s also about being brave enough to admit when something’s off, even if it looks good from the outside.
So, how do you actually start building an aligned life? Here’s what I’ve learned from coaching hundreds of people through this. Alignment is a process, but it always starts with these steps.
1. Get honest about where you’re at
Before you can fix anything, you’ve got to be real with yourself about what’s not working. This isn’t about beating yourself up. It’s just noticing. Ask yourself:
- What feels heavy or frustrating lately?
- Where am I saying ‘yes’ when I want to say ‘no’?
- Where am I doing things out of fear, guilt or habit?
This is where journalling really helps. You don’t need to have the answers, just get the truth out of your head and onto the page. It doesn’t have to be a big life overhaul.
I want to say this clearly: you don’t have to blow up your life to start living in alignment. You don’t need to move to the countryside, quit your job, or meditate for two hours every morning. Alignment isn’t about aesthetics. It’s about energy. It’s about how you feel when you open your laptop. It’s about how you feel after spending time with someone. It’s about how you talk to yourself in the mirror.
Most people think they need a big change. But in my experience, the most powerful shifts come from small, soulful adjustments. A boundary. A ‘no’. A walk. A deeper breath. That’s where the magic happens.
2. Let go (this is where EFT comes in)
Once you’re clear on what’s misaligned, you need to clear it from your system, not just your calendar! That’s where the Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT) is such a game changer.
I use it every day with my clients, and I teach it in all my programmes because it’s one of the fastest, most effective ways to calm your nervous system, let go of old beliefs and stress, and shift your energy and mindset in minutes.
It consists of tapping on certain points of your body while you speak out how you’re feeling – sounds weird, but it’s backed by science and works wonders, especially when you’re stuck in overwhelm or people-pleasing mode.
Try this when you’re feeling stressed or out of whack. Say: ‘Even though I feel like I’m carrying too much, I’m allowed to take a breath. I’m allowed to slow down. I’m allowed to choose a different way’. Tap gently on the side of your hand, collarbone or top of your head while you say it. You’ll feel the shift.
3. Rebuild from a new place – one choice at a time
Now you’ve cleared some space. This is where you get to choose differently.
What kind of mornings make you feel good? What kind of people give you energy instead of draining it? What boundaries would make life feel easier? You don’t need to figure it all out in one go. Just pick one thing today and do it differently.
This is how we rebuild: small steps, big impact.
Alignment includes everything – body, mind, energy, relationships
When I talk about alignment, I’m not just talking about business or mindset. It’s holistic. It’s everything.
- Your nervous system: Are you constantly in fight-or-flight?
- Your body: Are you sleeping, eating and moving in ways that support you?
- Your space: Is your environment helping you or stressing you out?
- Your relationships: Who do you spend your time with? Are those connections lifting you up or pulling you down?
You don’t have to change it all overnight. But when you start looking at your life through this lens, you’ll be amazed how much room there is for small, meaningful shifts.
The big myth: you don’t have to earn rest, joy, or peace
This is the belief I see coming up the most and one I’ve had to unlearn, too. You don’t have to hit rock bottom to make a change. You can choose differently now. You can choose peace now. You can build your life from a place of alignment – not after the chaos, but instead of it.
So if you’re in that ‘what now?’ moment – after burnout, after stress, after realising you’ve been running on empty – this is your sign.
You’re not broken. You’re just ready for more. More peace. More joy. More truth. More you. And building an aligned life isn’t about being perfect. It’s about choosing again, coming home to yourself, and letting that be enough.
