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An estimated 70% of women never experience orgasm during penetration alone, with nearly 10-15% of women never reaching orgasm during sex at all. In celebration of International Female Orgasm Day on August 8, world-renowned modern Tantra expert Sofia Sundari explains how we can live an orgasmic life.
Tantric sex is different from any other form of sex because in Tantra we approach it with consciousness. This means bringing our full awareness into every moment. This way, making love becomes a meditation. Being totally present during sex and connecting with your partner on a deeper level is the key to becoming more orgasmic, especially for women. By slowing down and focusing on the sensations we are experiencing, we can enjoy every single part of sex rather than racing to orgasm. Mainstream depictions of sex often don’t focus on fostering intimacy or depth.
In order to experience the vastness sexual pleasure has to offer, we need to reach a profound place of connectedness and depth with our partner. This process starts with us tuning into our body and opening up to feeling all sensations deeply, enhancing our sensitivity to the pleasure of touch. As women, when we connect with our bodies, we are able to connect with our femininity and therefore our sexual power.
Learning that a woman's arousal pattern begins on the outside of the body and moves inward towards more intimate zones, going in a completely opposite direction to male arousal, is an important key to couples giving and receiving deeper levels of pleasure.
Since humans are the only mammal with real erotic intelligence, establishing what turns you on is important. I don’t encourage the use of sex toys, because they tend to provide a stimulation that is not comparable to normal stimulation experienced during intercourse. Vibrators are often used to make the female arousal pattern match the male’s, which results in less pleasure, and they greatly reduce sensitivity.
Even though 70% of women don’t orgasm through penetration alone, women can in fact achieve a completely different level of orgasmic state through penetration. These steps can help:
1) Connecting to the body and therefore to our femininity is the first step, because this is how we connect to our sexual power.
2) Get out of the mind and be in the body – give your full presence to the act of love making, don’t think about what's coming next, be present with what’s happening and with the connection to your partner.
3) Sensual massage and tantric yoni de-armouring helps this process, because it involves stimulation of certain key points for women. Through stimulation and pressure of these points, a lot of tension is being released. Incredible healing happens through such practices, because the energetic flow in the body and the blood circulation are restored, making orgasms more frequent, powerful, and natural.
When you learn more about sexual energy and arousal, you can raise this energy in the body, and in the long run orgasms become more intense, last longer, and are more satisfying.
It is important to note that sexual practices constitute less than 5% of Tantra. However, it offers powerful tools that help with cultivation of a deeper awareness and connection with the self, your partner, and the universe at large.
About the author:
Sofia Sundari is an author, transformational facilitator, spiritual mentor and CEO of her 7 figure brand. She runs online programs and in-person immersions with a focus on empowered living, erotic embodiment and spiritual refinement.
Throughout her work wisdom keys, drawn from ancient teachings, that include Tantra, Taoism, Western Esoteric Science and Transpersonal Psychology are made applicable to modern day leaders’ lives.
She guides her clients to work on cultivating a profound connection to the body and soul, to understand masculine and feminine energetics, spiritual intimacy and sacred sexuality. However, in essence all her work is about coming home to your Higher Self.
For more info on Sofia’s full range of programs and in-person immersions please visit sofiasundari.com
