Seven Ways to Open to Plants
By Nathaniel Hughes
/ 6 December, 2024
Marking the launch of his immersive new book and card deck, Wild Enchantments: Learning from plants co created with...
Read More
Practise the art of non-attachment by creating a distance between who you are and what you own: Heather Grant shares her tips.
Take your journal and a pen and list all the external things in your life that you couldn’t imagine living without. Begin by thinking about the necessities, like food and shelter, then make it more personal, adding your beloved possessions and relationships. Is your list longer than you first expected? This exercise will help you recognise the external things you cling to, perhaps unsure of who you might be without them. It’s natural to want to hold on to people in your life and the things you’ve worked hard to attain, but there’s a difference between connecting and grasping. Who would you be if you loosened that grip? From Buddhist monks to modern-day backpackers, there’s a lot we can learn from the practice of non attachment, and fortunately, it doesn’t have to be as dramatic as ditching every item you’ve noted. The Art of Aparigraha In Patanjali’s eight limbs of yoga, the first step is a set of five ethical principles called the yamas. Aparigraha is one of these yamas. Derived from the Sanskrit graha, which means ‘to grab or seize’, pari, which means ‘on all sides’, and the prefix a- meaning ‘not’, it can be understood as the practice of non-attachment and non-possessiveness. In yogic tradition, aparigraha encourages you to let go of your attachment to material possessions. It can also be applied to non-material things. For example, yoga asana encourages the practice of non-attachment to outcomes; letting go of how a specific pose should look, and instead tuning inwards to see how it feels and if you can just be. In relationships, maintaining a sense of non-attachment prevents you from becoming codependent or jealous. It emphasises that nothing is permanent, and is instead all maya: the illusion that stops us seeing things clearly. Manjeet Mathur, a yoga philosophy expert who teaches at several yoga and tantra schools, says there are two ways yogis can interpret non-attachment. The ‘old-school’ interpretation is to be fully cautious of maya and to resist all worldly things. A modern yogic perspective, however, would be to enjoy the material world while knowing deep down that it’s not where your peace and joy comes from. ‘It’s about self-sourcing your happiness and seeing the happiness that comes from the outside world as simply a bonus’, Manjeet says. ‘You become the sun. Whether the outside world is clear or cloudy, you’ll shine regardless’. The key to aparigraha, then, is not so much about what you own, but how you relate to what you own. Is your sense of self tangled up with external things? Is there a dependency? Or is there a healthy distance that recognises the temporariness of it? Travelling Life Lightly In Jainism, possessions are believed to be an obstacle to liberation, and Jain monks have virtually no possessions other than the minimal food and shelter they require to live. Similarly, Buddhist monks abstain from all worldly possessions and a family life. A more modern equivalent, perhaps, is the trend of minimalist living. Backpacking, digital nomadism, van life – it seems that more and more people are choosing to travel life lightly and, as a result, practising non-attachment to people, places, or possessions. This is something I’ve experienced for myself. Two years ago, I packed my things into a backpack and set o with a one-way ticket to Southeast Asia. I’ve been based here ever since. Although I have considerably more possessions than the Jain and Buddhist monks, and I certainly have more than I strictly need, I’ve observed less of an attachment to material things than I did previously living at home. Similarly, Arianna Sabatino, a Hatha yoga teacher and tantra student who’s been living nomadically for four years now, shares that she’s become more mindful and minimalist since she started travelling. She notes that there are just a few items she believes she is attached to: ‘My altar – some statues, stones, and some malas I use for prayer. For me, they represent home’. Even with these belongings, Arianna has learnt to practise non-attachment: ‘I once lost one of my malas, as often happens with travelling, and I was upset as I was so attached to it... Ultimately, I realised that this is just an object, and what makes it special is me: my affection towards it and my memories surrounding it. There are no special objects. I make them special’. For me, this realisation hit home when I returned to my parents’ house for a visit. Faced with a room full of things, I found myself always reaching for the items I had in my backpack. I’d become so used to living without the other items that it felt like an unnecessary effort to reintroduce them back into my life. The clothes I didn’t pack felt like a costume – they weren't ‘me’ anymore. And no matter how tidy I kept the space, it constantly felt cluttered. My attachment to these material things had melted away, and I felt compelled to clear out everything I now deemed unnecessary. You see, when you live out of a backpack and have only what you need, you learn to need only what you have. When you’re forced to shorten your list of essentials and move yourself away from everything you identify with, you start to realise that you exist independently from all these things. It’s liberating, and it truly made me realise the power of aparigraha. Loosening Your Grip The good news is that you don’t have to renounce all worldly things like a monk, or pack your life into a backpack to practise non-attachment. You can simply reflect on what it would be like – and who you’d be – without a specific thing in your life. Ask yourself, ‘Who would I be if I didn’t have...?’ and meditate on what it would be like to loosen that grip. Some practical ways to practise non-attachment in day-to-day life include being mindful of your consumption and aware of why you acquire things. In your yoga asana practice, this might look like releasing your attachment to a specific studio or setting, and getting on your mat even when you’re in your pyjamas, or when your children are running around you. Manjeet also suggests practising silent meditation. ‘Once you get comfortable with the silence and stillness, you start to enjoy the nothingness. And once you enjoy the nothingness, anything more is merely a bonus’, he says. For Arianna, non-attachment is a path to living more fully in the now. ‘I give my fullest to every place and person I meet, because I never know if I will come back or if I will see them again. And even if I do, the circumstances will be different. The place will have changed, they will have changed, and I will have changed. I’ve learnt to detach from everything but the present moment’, she explains. When you take each moment as it is, without grasping it too tightly, you’re better able to immerse yourself fully in it. Aparigraha is an invitation to cultivate a happiness and self-worth that isn’t dependent on anything other than yourself. By releasing attachment and possessiveness to external things, you’ll release some of the anxiety, stress, loss, or sense of lack that accompanies them. This creates a greater sense of inner freedom, where things, people and ideas can effortlessly pass through, without any unnecessary bondage. Now, return to the list you began with and write these reminders over everything you listed:
