How to Love Yourself This Valentine’s Day

Do you ever feel guilty or say bad things about yourself? Are you unable to give or receive a compliment? Do you ever feel jealous? Are you unable to give or accept affection? Do you criticize others or compare yourself with others? Are you sick all the time? Do you not take your own needs into account, not ask for what you want, or deny yourself things that you want? How many of these did you answer yes to? If you said yes even once, you could definitely up the radical self-love factor in your life! David Hamilton lists few ways you can treat yourself with love and respect.

The words that we say create our reality. This is an indisputable fact. It is for this precise reason that we should concentrate on saying things that empower us rather than make us feel bad about ourselves. We can use positive words, compliment others and ourselves, talk about the beauty of the world around us, and say how fortunate we feel to be having these experiences . . . or we can use negative words, criticize others, tell ourselves how unworthy we are of anything good, complain about the events of our lives, and grizzle at every given opportunity. It is just common sense to know that doing the latter is not going to make us feel good or happy in any way!

Every happy thought brings something good to you, while each negative one pushes good things away. This can be an overwhelming concept. When people first hear this and start to actively pay attention to their thoughts, they feel like they might go crazy!

Don’t worry; it is totally normal to think, Oh God, I think so many negative thoughts and so few positive ones—I am never going to beat this! The good news is that positive thoughts are so much more powerful than negative ones! Even if you have been thinking negatively your entire life, it’s okay. You can now begin to incorporate happy, exciting, wonderful thoughts into your daily routine to bring in oodles of positive change!

Our overall state of happiness is essentially a reflection of how we feel about ourselves. Radical self-love is the root of all of this, and if you don’t have that, everything else will fall apart. Here are a few ways you can treat yourself with love and respect.

You might like to come up with your own additions to this list, too!

♥ Let people know how you want to be treated. This is easy to do: if you treat yourself and others well, people will notice and mirror that back at you! Or you could always just learn to ask for what you want!

♥ Learn to accept compliments. Even if you feel awkward about being told you’re beautiful, intelligent, or wonderful, say thank you!

♥ Start to dish out compliments with gusto! It is one of the easiest ways for us to feel good about ourselves, and you will make someone else feel fabulous, too.

♥ Learn to experience pleasure without guilt. This cantake time but is absolutely worth working on.

♥ Always say good things about yourself. The old adage is true: if you don’t have anything nice to say (about yourself), don’t say anything at all!

♥ Be good to your body. Eat nutritious food, exercise, take care of your skin, and wear clothing that makes you happy.

♥ Realize that what you DO is not who you ARE. Everyone makes mistakes, so don’t get confused and tangle them up with your self-worth.

♥ Spend time around people who make you feel good and who encourage you to go after your dreams. Do the same for them!

♥ Congratulate yourself when you do well at something! This will help reinforce the fact that you don’t need anyone else’s approval or external validation.

♥ Always visualize how you want to be, not how you are right now, and you will find yourself gravitating toward those attributes and becoming that person. This sounds so simple but works like nothing else!

To find out more, you can read I Heart Me: The Science of Self-Love by David R Hamilton PhD.




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